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Whatever Floats Your Bloat

The most tolerant intolerant eater

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Tag: Thornbury

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Umberto Espresso Bar, Thornbury

  • by Sonia Nair
  • Posted on September 16, 2018September 16, 2018

Umberto is the ideal place to celebrate a milestone if you’re not into stiff restaurants and contrived food – the dishes are honest and down-to-earth, the restaurant is charming and comfortable, and the waitstaff are pleasant to a fault.

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  • Cafes

Short Round, Thornbury

  • by Sonia Nair
  • Posted on February 18, 2018February 11, 2018

Short Round was as good as I remember – If I’m ever in Thornbury with my parents and a shut creperie, I won’t think twice about visiting again.

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  • Restaurants

Northern Git, Thornbury

  • by Sonia Nair
  • Posted on September 20, 2016September 25, 2016

Northern Git was suggested as the perfect place for a mid-week dinner, and after realising it was on my 180-page list of places I want to try in Melbourne, I started rapaciously scouring the menu – deciding at least two days in advance that we would definitely be having the spicy chicken wings with blue cheese.

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About

When you’re histamine- and lactose-intolerant as well as lacking a somewhat vital organ such as a gallbladder, everything floats your bloat – tomatoes, eggplant, mature cheeses (so most good cheeses), wine, spinach, almond milk, every form of preserved meat (yes, that includes bacon), that little bit of ghee your mum slips into her dahl to make it taste all the better.

Bloat Scores

0 Living the dream

1 Had to loosen my belt a notch

2 The belt had to be completely removed

3 I could have balanced a glass of wine on my bloated stomach

4 If I were lying prostrate on my tummy, it would have looked as though I was levitating

5 So full of gas I floated home like a hot air balloon

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